Posted by Joe Baker on June 20, 2001 at 11:04:11:
In Reply to: I Tip my Hat to You posted by Tracy H. on June 19, 2001 at 01:31:16:
Tracy, I've been reading this thread for a few days, and have finally decided to chip in with a few thoughts. Just to let you know my background, I'm a 40-year-old computer programmer who started as a music major and finished with a C.S degree. I've seen people who were satisfied in life and people who were dissatisfied in life, and have some opinions about what causes those attitudes. It seems to me that satisfaction stems from having made wise decisions in youth. Regrets tend to haunt you more and more as you age. So without further ado, my input:
1. Whatever you do, get a degree. Music, underwater basket-weaving, computer science, whatever, but GET A DEGREE. Many doors in life open or shut based purely on whether or not you possess a bachelor's degree, so get one. Once you have a family, it becomes almost impossible, especially for a Mom.
2. You will impress your parents, free them up to be more supportive, and take the pressure off of yourself if you go to the folks, acknowledge their concerns, and agree to re-assess and discuss your goals again after the first year of music school. Tell them some old codger on the BBS told you that things appeared differently to him after a year of music study, and you know it *COULD* be the same for you. In short, get your parents more on your side by letting them see that you are not throwing rationality out the window. You will need their support, and this will help get it.
3. Sit down now, today, and write a summary of what you want life to be like ten years from now. Kids? House? Vacations? Activities? Living in a particular place? You must know if your other desires in life are compatible with the life of a musician or music educator. If not, then you must decide what you want more. The notion that you can 'have it all' is simply not true. My 17-year-old daughter wants to sing on Broadway but live in Montana. I am finally getting her to understand that she will have to choose.
4. For as long as you are a music major, even if you've decided you want to do something else starting the next semester, pour your heart and soul into it. I have no regrets about changing my major, but lots of regret about just pretty much quitting in the middle of a semester.
I wish you much happiness and, better still, contentment with whatever path you take.
God Bless,
Joe Baker