Posted by Ian Easton on October 04, 2001 at 01:35:57:
In Reply to: Adrenalin posted by Rick Denney on October 03, 2001 at 15:17:14:
Drawing a little on other's comments:
I used to worry greatly about my playing, perhaps lacking confidence, or giving the control to others (caring deeply about their opinions of my playing). Now I've found my rut (er niche) I play for myself, and can literally breathe more easily, and make fewer errors.
I care about my playing (and don't want my standard to slip) but no longer care so much what others think of me: that partially came from the realisation that most don't think of the tuba at all. Is that too cynical? I've had many compliments when I'm playing badly, and many people talking through my most finely wrought solos.
Nice if one is able to afford this position: students and pros perhaps don't have the luxury.
I could get into the whole Barry Green/Tim Galwey "Innner game of..." stuff, which is very helpful, but it basically comes down to silencing the inner voice (anyone seen the Gary Larson Far Side cartoon of the percussionist with one crash cymbal saying "don't stuff up, don't stuff up"), confidence/self assurance and remembering why you're there (which in my case is self enjoyment).
An interesting topic: which got me thinking (see thread above "playing in the zone")
Ian (more stream of consciousness than a coherent argument!) Easton