Posted by code red on September 24, 2002 at 07:16:37:
Ok, farther down the page, someone suggested finding out what less-than-favorable conditions we have played under. I thought this was a good idea. I'll kick it off with five quickies....Enjoy!!
(Before I start: For those of you concerned with grammar and spelling, I just got home after a VERY long day and I am, quite frankly, too tired to spell/grammar check. So, if there are any errors you can't live with, bite me. Also, before you decide to reply to the fact that one of the instances was completely my fault, and terribly irresponsible... I know I was stupid. Isn't youth wonderful???)
1) I was doing a concert with the James Taylor and the Chicago Symphony Orchestra. There was one rehearsal and only one show. Several hours before the concert (but after the rehearsal), I had a brass quintet gig, where I noticed I was getting warmer. I thought nothing of it, took a nap, when I got home, and had some nice warm soup. When I woke-up at 6:30p.m., I was up to 102 degrees and it as WAY to late to call-in sick. Throughout the gig, I felt it getting harder and harder to take in air. Charlie Vernon helped me make it through by wagging his feet during the show and saying, "Yeah, man" between tunes. I got home after the concert and checked my temperature: 104.5. To the emergency room I went. Turns out I had pneumonia. My right lung was almost COMPLETELY full. It was about an 1 1/2" from the top, according to the x-ray.
2) Christmas-time: I got called to do a "Nutcracker" with the Milwaukee Ballet. Two days before I was to play, my appendix nearly burst. The doctor gave me VERY STRICT orders to not so much as lift my tuba. Well, of course, I didn't listen to a word he said. So, with one day of recovery (which, I might add, is not NEARLY enough) I drove to the gig, played it, and drove back home. Dragging that tuba into and out of the hall was no picnic. I paid DEARLY for it the next few days....
3) If you have weak knees, you may not want to read this one. I had a "pops" concert which included Star Wars, The Music Man, The Wizard of Oz, etc. on a Thursday. On the Wednesday before, I had a rehearsal for it. I slept in late and showered and shaved a little later than usual. While I was shaving, the doorbell rang (the doorbell NEVER rings). I was startled and turned my head. The only problem was, I forgot to remove the razor from my face. Well, I ended up slicing-off just over 1/4" from the center of my upper lip. As it turned out, Walgreens has this stuff called "New Skin". I tried it. It hurlt like hell, but it did stop the bleeding. I went to the rehearsal and brought the "New Skin" and a towel. Good thing I brought the towel... Anyway, the next night, I ended up doing the gig, AND walking around to all the little kids in front of the orchestra to play "If I only hads a Brain"...how very fitting. When it was over, it looked like I had gone 15 rounds with Mike Tyson.
4) The end of my freshman year at the University of WI-Eau Claire: The Symphony Band was playing for the school's commencement ceremonies. It was to be Dr. Jerry Young and myself on tubas. He was playing because the two grad tuba players had already left or something like that. Well, like I said, it was the end of my freshman year, and I had made several new friends. Several new friends with valid I'.D.'s. I think you can see where I'm going with this one. Call time was 9:30 a.m. I got home around 5a.m. having started "celebrating" at around 7p.m. the night before. I think I finally showed up around 10:15. I arrived to hear the band playing along. I slid into my chair and got the music out. Doc didn't say a two words to me the whole day. But he sure let me know how he felt. For the remainder of the performances, he played with his bell pointing straight at my head, and he wasn't gentle...
5) My personal favorite. I was filling in for Jerome Stover(principal tuba, Honolulu Symphony) on a Civic Orchestra "new music" concert. I had been feeling kinda backed-up all day. During the dress rehearsal, which just would NOT end, I started feeling a little...er....irregular. They were recording the dress rehearsal to be spliced in with the concert performances. So, I really couldn't leave. Well, the next thing I new we were playing and all of the sudden my ass decides it had had enough and proceded to empty itself. Yup, filled me trousers I dd! Well, lucky for me, brake was called (thank you GOD!!) and I flew to the dressing room and.....disposed of the evidence.
Ok, the pissing contest has officially been started....